Sunday, September 10, 2006

I am so sorry for not writing for such a long time. Actually, it has been only five days since my last entry. Anyway, things, particularly one, were not looking my way since I last wrote.

Wednesday, 6 September 2006
The day of our History (Pairwork) Presentation. Before that, Enx and I were having a splendid fight online at some unearthly hour. My feelings for her hit rock-bottom when she told me that her printer was not working. It went lower when she 'confessed' that she was too lazy to use the other printer which was in the living-room. What made things even more difficult was the fact that my laptop had to have some sort of glitch even before I had things settled. Thus, I was waiting damn f***ingly patiently for it to reboot until it came to a point where I took out the battery and put it back in again. That was the same concept as switching off the main power point of a normal personal computer. I got another bout of angry-ness when she told me about some point in my part of the notes. A good thing was that she 'suggested', not 'insist'. God bless her... The notes/hand-outs were finally done by 7.30am. I went to bed, for an hour, after that.

The presentation was quite interesting, in the sense that we, Enx and I, played a game with our History tutorial group. We planned all these before hand. Unfortunately, we should have let the group hear an extract of how the two main pianists' styles of playing were like before we played the 'Guessing Game'. That was the cause of our great downfall... Good Lord... Why was I so stupid as to not include some sort of background infomation of the pianists??? Why, why, why???!!! Stupid, stupid, STUPID... It was only when I was going through Shaun's and YR's presentation notes that I realised that missing part. I was horrifically disgusted with myself... RK told us that our presentation, on the whole, was almost an A, which in my opinion (not too sure about Enx's) was a far cry from Juls' and Char's.

Friday, 8 September 2006
My first few practices in the morning went well, and that was the only time I practiced before Piano class in the afternoon.
It was my turn. I went up to the piano, Steinway, no less, and played Chopin's Etude Op. 25 No. 2. It was the same one I played the second last time. I could not believe things went wrong. I tried to amend the situation but it just got worse. Slip notes, locked fingers, horrible pedaling, the works! I was dejected. When I got back to my seat, I nearly cried. In fact, tears were threatening to spill over. I hated myself. It was the most horrible and terrible performance I had put on. Good Lord... I was so annoyed and irritated with myself and I still am whenever I think about it. While seated there, I very much wanted the ceiling to fall on me, or else to have a hole open up and swallow me. I was gloomy... Miserable... And, did I mention annoyed, irrtated and f***ing angry??? No??? Well, I was angry too.

Today, 10 September 2006
I attended a concert at the Esplanade Recital Studio this afternoon with many others from school. The first part was Schonberg's Pierrot Lunaire, which was in German. The actress/narrator was sprechgesang-ing through the whole 21 poems, with music accompaniment. I have no idea how to describe her style. However, I managed to fall soundly asleep through all the screeching. Amazing. The second part, thankfully, was a hundred times more bearable than the previous even though the poetry was rather weird. Francis Poulenc's Le Bal Masque was more melodious and definitely shorter, lasting only 20 minutes as it contained only six parts including 4 poems, unlike the other one which lasted for an hour.

After that, Char accompanied me to the MPH Bookstore over in Citylink Mall. We went walking around the area before we parted ways; she was heading back to the Esplanade to meet the others before going home for dinner while I was headed for the busstop near City Hall to get home.

By the way, Enx 'disappeared' after the first half of the recital to go 'walking' with ShuHan and Ivan. Char and I came 'across' a trio of waving monkeys at the Thai Express Restaurant while we were walking in the Esplanade/Raffles City direction. Naughty little Enx...

I have come to realise that I tend to use vulgarities when I am hitting the bottom of the ocean. Sigh... Somehow, I find relief in 'saying' those words. Actually, it is the only word which you can tell just by reading all the above.

Well, there is so much work to do and, as usual, I am not in the mood to be hard working. Procrastinating. That is what I am doing now. May Mary pray for me that I will stop being this way.

Looks like I will have to make a trip back to the Esplanade tomorrow so as to settle some little problem with one of the DVDs I borrowed the last time. It seems like all the other items were returned without a glitch except for this one. Thankfully I checked my library account status after Enx told me that she accidentatly forgot to return a CD to its case before returning. So, the empty case is sitting in the library while the CD is at home with her. That cuttlefish of a cat... Anyway, back to my problem. If all my other borrowed/returned items were cleared, why is it there is one which did not? Hmmm... Something fishy is going on... Oh well, looks like I had better check my stuff before I hammer the library for having such a f***-up system. There I go again...